It is a beautiful day here in sunny Phoenix. The day high should be in the mid-70s! Whewee! This is TRULY why folks retire here. There is nothing nicer than a warm spring day. Unfortunately, allergies are in high gear. The desert wildflowers are all in bloom, and that means that the grass is growing (there is weed and grass every where -- not on nice lawns like back East -- but in the rocks and other places where you don't want it to be!) The grass is especially difficult for me. It really causes my head to stuff and the pressure to build up right over my eyes! Yuck!
Today, we are going to a Children's Worker BBQ at our church. It is a BYOB type affair (soda and chips) where they will provide the hot dogs and hamburgers. I am glad we will have a nice day for it. It looked there for a minute like we might continue to have cold and rainy weather. But, the Lord has decided to let this day shine forth and it is lovely. A good day to sit in a lawn chair and munch on a hot dog!
My plans for today are to rest. I am really tired. My adrenal system is in over-drive, but I am feeling a little better. I am finally over that illness/flu bug of a couple weeks ago. I am finally feeling like I can breathe now. The tiredness is really apparent in the mornings. I got out of bed this morning, fed the cats, put the wash into the dryer, made my cup of coffee, and I am worn out. I am literally worn out.
There is no way for me to do any type of work until this situation resolves. I simply can not do more than stay here at home and do the minimum required to keep my home afloat. I think the reality of my tiredness has really sunk in. For as much as I want to work and to start making my own income so I can become responsible for myself and my son, I cannot do it yet. My Spirit is willing, but my body is not ready.
This is the message that the Lord has been telling me now for nearly eight months: "Carol, you must rest." Like I have blogged before, I thought He meant sleep. Sleep is part of resting, but that wasn't what He was saying. Then I thought He meant "resting in Him" and I definitely have worked on that aspect of our relationship. Yet, even still, that wasn't it. No, He meant this type of rest. Rest from activity, rest from stress-inducers, rest like in a long sabbatical rest. This the the only type of rest that will allow my body to be healed.
Years ago, when I was first diagnosed with CFS (Chronic Fatigue), the doctor told me that the only way to recover from an episode was to have complete rest. He said then, that I would know it because it would be like I was trying to walk with cement boots on. I have been there and done that one so many times, yet I always keep on walking. I think I have pushed through my CFS episodes with never really resting and that is why now I am in the deplorable shape I am in.
Rest. Rest. Rest. Today, I plan on resting.