October 27, 2012

End of the Month!

I cannot believe that it is almost November! My goodness, how this month has flown by. So much has changed, and I have been very busy -- so busy -- that I haven't had time to Blog. I guess that is a really good thing, right? It is good to be busy, and to have your days zoom by (versus slow draggy days where all you do is watch the clock.)

I feel like I finally know what I am doing at work. I don't know every answer, and I don't know how to do every task assigned to me, but I have a good "general" understanding of my job. I have taken on more work the past week, and now have a pretty full plate. My boss seems to like the fact that I can take on jobs that others are not able to do, and she seems to like that she can ask me to do something and I pretty much can figure it out, or at least attempt to do it. I need to manage my time well, but with the Lord's provision, I feel confident that I can do what has been assigned to me to do.

I am supposed to work this weekend, but I am being a little bull-headed (well, I am actually a "BULL" as in surname, you know!) I asked my boss if I could work from home this weekend, and she said "no." Then our Director sent out an email saying that she had no parameters on how we completed the extra work, just so long as it was done by EOD on Monday. Ok, taking liberty with that "just so long" bit, I decided to bring my laptop home and do my work from home. Even if I have some small work leftover on Monday, I would rather be home today than in the office. I may still go in later on, just to rearrange my office cube. We'll see how I am feeling around 11 a.m. (grin!)

I have to say that I love my new job. My Mom reminds me that I said that about UOPX too. Yes, Mom -- you are right. However, the "love" part is not a total "I love everything about my job" and I think that is where the confusion comes into play. I did like my job at UOPX, really I did. For the first three months, I actually liked it. I didn't like all the aspects of the job: making cold calls, keeping a daily log of how many dials you made, checking in with your manager who would remind you of how many dials you made, etc. Generally, though, I liked my manager and my team. I liked the fun we had and the opportunity for growth, graduate school, etc. I liked ALOT of aspects of working at UOPX, just not everything about the job.

I would say that the same is true for CVS. I like my job a lot, I like the tasks and the kind of work. This work suits me, and is a better fit than what I was doing at UOPX. I like my group, though I don't think I will form the same kind of friendships -- I had a lot in common with the people at UOPX. School was a priority for them, and education was of high value. I felt validated by my peers, and I haven't felt that way at CVS yet.

I see things that I don't particularly like, but they are individual and not global. I see how individuals handle the pressure, and I see how management reacts to fires. I don't see a slow steady hand, a calm leader, and a focused director. I see very nice people, fun -- who tend to run around a put out fires. That is OK, but I would prefer the slow, steady leader who is focused and strong. You know -- there are times when you have to do the work, and you just do it. I get it. I understand, and if I were in that position, it would be less frantic, and more calm. Just do it, just do it, just do it (thanks, Wayne McLaws, former UOPX manager for that ditty!)

I think I get it now, I think I understand "jobs" better than before. I mean, I worked for myself for so long, and now I have been employed by two major corporations. I remember what it is like to work for the big company, and I have seen that management directives are very scattered, and often reactive. The Lord has consistently told me not to get hung up on the "job." I was unemployed for so long that it was difficult not to hope for a job -- to solve all my worries and fears and to relieve the stress and pressure I was under. He reminded me that there was only one job -- His JOB, His WORK, and that any other work I performed was to provide income to take care of me and my son. I nodded and I said I understood. I did, of course, I did really get it. I just didn't grasp how significant this truth was to me. I now see things better, more clearly, and I realize that there is a big difference in the kinds of work you can do. There are varying shades of grey, to borrow a popular phrase, and different types of work and tasks. I understand that the best work is His work. The most satisfying work is His work. All other jobs are just income-makers to help pay the bills, and do the business of daily living.

God's work is always number one, and will always bring the most joy, the most satisfaction, and the most fulfillment. Other work can be, and may be good -- but God's work is best.

Today's Bible verse (KLOVE) was from Psalm 138:8 NLT:

The LORD will work out his plans for my life--for your faithful love, O LORD, endures forever.

The Lord is working out the plans He has for my life. I know this is true. I see it every day, and I marvel at what He has already done for me. I thank Him for His Faithful Love, and I wait with eager anticipation for what will be next. I am like the batter in the on deck circle. I am waiting to go up to the plate, to take my turn, and I practice swinging, getting loose, getting ready to go. As soon as the Umpire yells, "Batter up!" I will walk to the plate and take my place, ready to connect with whatever kind of ball (or opportunity) the Lord pitches my way. For now, I look on, I wait anxiously (the good kind), and I watch the game. I see where the players are out on the field, and I know the plans for the game (the strategy, the goals, and the strengths and weaknesses of the other players). I survey everything while I swing my bat, practicing my stance, and preparing to do my job. God knows the plans He has for me, and He is preparing me for great things.

Until He reveals that next pitch, I wait for Him. I look, and I wait. I stay alert, and I practice. I am ready, Lord, I am ready. Put me in the game, call me up to the plate, for I am ready, Oh Lord!


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