April 4, 2014

Ready to Move On

I had a dream about trains last night. I was on a train, and I was riding in the engineers compartment. It was a funny dream because I was on the train, but also off the train at a couple points. The whole sequence lasted a long time. I wrote down all the various snapshots that took place in my dream, and after looking through them, I think my dream was about closure, the ending of my former life, and the beginning of my new life. Well, at least, that is what I think it was about -- for all I know -- it just could have been nothingness with a BIG TRAIN in it!

I did a little search on the Internet for dream interpretation. I love to read what other people THINK dreams mean and how they interpret them. I love it when a dream dictionary will say that such and such means this OR it could mean something completely opposite! LOL! Yeah, how can something be two opposing things...NOT!

In my case, though, I do agree with some of the dream interpretation and ideas in the dream dictionary. I definitely see that my dream wasn't just a dream about a train. It was very specific images and sequences that made sense, they followed a progressive pattern which led me to believe that the dream was a story of sorts. Most of my dreams don't make sense to me. Some are snippets that seem so random. However, at times, I will have a dream that tells a story, from a beginning to the end. This is the kind of dream I had last night. Weird, dream, but nonetheless, it seemed to tell me a story.

In my dream, I was waiting to get on a train (beginning a journey). I saw the whole train in my mind, from engine to caboose. This train was a freight train with flatbed cars carrying various items. It also had cars that had people in them. I got on the train and sat in the front with the driver. At first it was just me and the driver. Later there was the driver, another man, and another woman.

For a time, I rode with the driver. Then I was off the train and I watched the train move away from me. The train was going very fast, and it wasn't going in a straight line, but rather it was weaving around like a amusement park ride. I got back on the train, but not at the front. I got on at the back of the train. I started to move to the front again, but I stopped to see two families. One had a lady who was pregnant. She was in a car with her husband. I had a conversation with her. The second was a family who were living in a tent on a flatbed car. They were all together on this car. I didn't speak with them. Then I found my way back to the front, and I sat in the back seat. There were two men in front, and another woman in the back. I was cold, and I put on my socks.

The train came to a stop and the four of us got into a car. We started to drive north, and I was in the back seat. I looked out the window and I saw a massive tornado. The tornado was moving south. It had one white funnel and four black funnels around it. I noticed that we started to drive through debris, mostly downed trees. There was debris on the road. I asked if the debris was from the tornado, and the man driving said no.

We stopped at an office. We went in and sat in the reception area. It was a doctor or dentists office. I sat by the receptionists window, and I had a conversation with her. I asked about the weather and tornado. I asked if they had a TV to know the latest news. She said the doctor didn't want to know the details so there was no TV. Then she got up and walked outside. Her mother was there to pick her up and they waved goodbye to me. I watched her leave and then I woke up.

Weird dream, for sure. I think now that this dream was a recap of my life. I think the two men were my husband and my son. The woman in the back was the woman that my husband never stopped loving, and the woman he kept secretly in his heart throughout the years of our marriage. I am not sure about the other people, I didn't recognize them. The tornado was symbolic of destruction, and the fact that I wasn't afraid tells me that I am no longer in fear of the news about my life. The office is unknown, and I don't know why the woman told me goodbye. I am thinking that this was closure, the ending of my life as I know it. I am not sure.

So as I consider this dream, for what it is worth, and I think about where I am now, this is what I think:

Trains in dreams usually symbolize a journey.
Engineers are usually the one in control of the journey.
Tornadoes symbolize destruction, chaos or being out of control.
Pregnancy is usually a sign of new life or a new idea.

I know that I am on a journey, this is for certain. I believe that the One driving my life is not my husband nor my son (the second man), but the Lord. I am not sure of the rest other than to say that it makes sense to me to assume that this dream was my former life, and that the reason I wasn't emotionally connected to any of it was that I have already acknowledge it, and I have accepted the outcome of it. I am not afraid nor do I fear any emotional hurt.

As I move forward in my life, this dream tells me that my former life is over. The train pulled into the train station (a sign of a completed journey). However, I got in the car and kept traveling with my husband and son and this other woman. I think this means that I have been holding on, staying together as a family, even though the family is no longer three, but four. The doctor's office could have been a legal office. Perhaps the end of the story is that there will be divorce. I am not sure, but normally a completed journey ends in death (end of the course of a person's life). In my case, there was no end, so perhaps it just means that there will be a legal end. Not sure, but again, it does make sense.

Oh well. I know where I am going. I know where I have been. I am ready to do whatever the Lord asks of me. I am ready to go where He leads. This dream may be nothing, and it probably is just the result of taking two liquid Aleve's before bedtime. Who knows? Not sure, but I am trusting the Lord nonetheless and I am resting in His understanding of my life, my needs, and my desires. Lord, have your way in me this day. In Jesus' Name, I ask this, AMEN!

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